Sunday, July 24, 2011

Born Fat

I do understand how ridiculous this post is. And that's the point! My mood is particularly "fatuous" and I need a break from the previous week's posts about combating weight loss, succeeding, finally, amidst all the angst of being a 12 time Yo-yoer for 45 years and losing 1190 pounds overall until this last weight loss arriving at BMI  21...and then getting hell about it from people who used to be thinner than I. If that last sentence is long and convoluted, then amen! That's how I feel about it.

Anyway, this is dedicated to my past. My mom always told this "joke" when someone would comment about my weight to her. It was one of the many prompts that finally motivated me to lose weight in HS. Right after I was born, a particular nurse told my mom (in for her three day stay at Bayshore Southside on LI) that I constantly cried. Clueless about why I was crying (lonely...alone?) the nurse shoved a bottle in my mouth to shut me up. She told my mom, "You're going to have trouble with that child; she's always hungry." (The nurse was overweight, herself.) My mom took the nurse's comment and milked it for all it was worth (her own breasts were dry) with the convenient excuse that I was "Born Fat" inherently and what she fed me had little to do with it. From birth, in other words, I was a destined obeser and fortune stamped me overeating right after I popped out of her womb. (I was average weight at birth.)

Whatever floats your boat. My mom was was overweight and at one point near obese, but my fat was my burden to deal with. The joke absolved her from all responsibility. For that joke, I offer another with a bit of music to make the message go down easily. (message at the very end)

                                               Born Fat

Born fat, as fat as a rhino
As fat as the whale blows,
Born fat with blubber and lard.

Live fat, and hatred surrounds you.
Their mocking astounds you,
Each day you follow your heart.

Stay fat, your weight will divide you.
From those who deride you,
There's no where to hide.

Born fat. Life's no more worth living.
And no one is giving,
'Cause you're born fat!

Stay fat, your weight will divide you.
From those who deride you,
There's no where to hide.

Born fat. Life's no more worth living,
And no one is giving,
'Cause you're born fat.

Lyrics to the original song "Born Free" are by Don Black and the music is by John Barry. Matt Monro sings.

"Subliminal" message:  Do not blame your children for being FAT if YOU are overweight or obese. Straighten out your own hypocrisy, first. If you don't like their FAT, lose weight and cut with the self-righteous, Pharisaical yammering at them. They can see you.

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