Thursday, May 3, 2012

Commemorating Mom: Mother's Day Giveaway!



Normally, I don't get involved with giveaways. But this is the 40th anniversary since my mother's death. She died on April 28th, 1972 in a fatal car accident. She and my aunt were killed instantly, we were told.

They were in the back seat of a volkswagon van, you know, the cool kind that hippies painted up with all sorts of neat day-glow graffiti and wacky designs. Only this was no day-glow volkswagon van. It was a death-trap for my mom and aunt. And years later, after it was discontinued because others lost their lives, we found out why. Those vans had a high center of gravity. They tipped over and rolled easily.

That is what happened when my uncle, who was driving, had to break because someone cut him off (two-lane highway and the guy was passing the van). Well, when my uncle breaked, the van swerved and tipped and rolled, throwing my mom and aunt out of the van. Those were the days before mandatory seat-belts.

Years later looking back, I miss and love her and my aunt. But if any good can come out of a tragedy, and I believe it can, my brother married my best friend who was at the funeral. He didn't even look at her before. And the product of their marriage is the blessing of my two nephews who are now grown men and my grandniece who is eleven, going on sixteen, very brilliant and absolutely beautiful. But then, I'm a proud aunt and grandaunt.

Tragedy birthed blessings. But I must tell you that I have tremendous faith and belief in God, as did my mom and my aunt who were solid Christians. It was my faith that sustained me through the period of her loss. When my mom's teaching career ended with her death, mine began. I taught HS English, mentored college student teachers, went on to get my Master's Degree and my Ph.D. and discovered my writing talents during the dissertation process.

Through loss comes rebirth, reinvention and reconciliation. I didn't mention that my Dad and I didn't really get along: old world Italian gentleman, new world American daughter with radical views. All that changed when my mom died; we became very close. God will take a curse and make it into a blessing if you watch and pray. I pray he does that for you if you are reading this and have suffered loss that was not understandable at the time. That is my special prayer and Giveaway for you every day including Mother's Day. ;-)  And of course, there is a REAL GIVEAWAY HERE!!!  Enjoy and good luck!

                                                         

20 comments:

T. J. Banks said...

Carole, what a truly powerful piece. There is always rebirth, always a gift...even if we don't recognize it right away. Sometimes, as another writer said, we have to have our hearts broken wide-open. The Phoenix Principle.

Carole Di Tosti said...

Thanks so much for your comment. It means a lot.

Anonymous said...

This is a very touching post. Thanks for sharing this. We really have to enjoy each day and the people we love. Easier said than done, but we really should not "sweat the small stuff".

annc999 said...

Losing our mothers is so difficult. I lost mine over a year ago. I cry a lot to this day and will always feel a void in my life. However, God is good, and he took her when she was suffering the most. We will be together again one day.

Thank you for the lovely words.

Carole Di Tosti said...

Sending my prayers and sympathy to you. I know what you mean about the grieving process. It takes a while as you work through the emotions. Each day it gets a little better. But she is with you now in Spirit, though her tangible presence is not there. But I'm sure if you think about it, little signs of have been made aware to you from time to time...and they hit you like all at once, then you forget them. Nevertheless, she is alive in another realm.

The best always and thanks for sharing.

Carole

Carole Di Tosti said...

I received a post comment from Katrin but the post didn't come through here. But I will put it up (It's from her e-mail to me.) She said: "This is a very touching post. Thanks for sharing this. We really have to enjoy each day and the people we love. Easier said than done, but we really should not "sweat the small stuff".

I would agree...for sure Katrin.
Thanks for sharing that. It's something I intellectually know to do but fail at it so often, it rankles my soul and frustrates me...because I do sweat the small stuff. Bad habit...need to stop it for 28 days. It's the next thing on my list to try to revise in my life.

Peace out...

Unknown said...

It is so difficult to lose a parent. I am so sorry for your loss. My mom passed away in 1993. It would take weeks before I stopped picking up the phone and dialing to call her. There is a peace that came over me knowing that she was with Jesus, that was my comfort. Glad to connect. I just wrote a post about losing my daughter. You can view it here: Forgiveness is a gift

Carole Di Tosti said...

What would we do without Christ's all encompassing love, His peace and His Joy that strengthens us and gives us understanding, though the darkness looks so bleak there doesn't seem to be an end to it? We are fortunate to have been chosen to receive this blessing of love and Faith. Many are in darkness. And as we have received this blessing then we have an unction and a responsibility with our writing to elucidate and stir up others toward receiving the same blessing we've received, if it is given to them.
Thanks for sharing and reaching out to me. You have stirred the fountain within and I hope I have stirred the fountain within you.
Let's keep in touch.
Continued blessings and love,
Carole

Amberr Meadows said...

I am so sorry to hear about the tragic loss of your mom. Mine died when I was 16 from blunt head trauma. I pray for everyone has has been as unfortunate. Take care!

Carole Di Tosti said...

I'm sorry to hear about your Mom, Amberr. Thank God the Lord gives us comfort in such situations. I am glad to know that you have turned to Him and you have faith. And I do believe that it is faith that is sustaining us and growing us in Him in our lives.

God bless,
Carole

Anonymous said...

Wow. So powerful. I googled a search for how to commemorate Mother's Day this year and this is what popped up. My mom died in 2005, ending her struggle with diabetes. We had a tough time being mother and daughter, but we loved each other tremendously. Since her passing, I have done a lot of thinking about what has come from her passing. My understanding and compassion toward her has grown and so has forgiveness of myself for not being a better daughter. Thank you for your beautiful post.

Delinda said...

Thanks for the post. I was lucky. I lost my mom less than a year ago. This is the first mother's day without her. Mom's are special.

Carole Di Tosti said...

You are fortunate you had her with you for most of your life. I lost my mom in my early 20s.
Thanks for sharing.

Kw mccabe said...

I miss my mom- I moved out of state and now we can only talk on the phone

Kw mccabe said...

I miss my mom- I moved out of state and now we can only talk on the phone

Carole Di Tosti said...

I know what you mean. Thanks goodness that you can still talk to her and will for Mother's Day.
By the way, love the picture on your blog...sleeping at the desk. Great.

Thanks for the comment. Let's keep in touch...also find me on Twitter at @mercedeskat45

Ciao for now,
Carole

Amberr Meadows said...

I miss my mom, aunt, and grandmother, too, and this post of loss, sadness, but hope made me both tearful and hopeful. Thank you. Happy Mother's Day to you and every other mom out there.

Carole Di Tosti said...

Thanks for your heartfelt words, Amberr. I agree. Happy Mother's Day to all the moms past, present and soon to be. ;-)

writingfeemail said...

Yours is a powerful post about God turning bad events into good outcomes. I love your attitude.

Carole Di Tosti said...

Wow. Thanks for saying that. You made my day ;-) Happy MOther's Day!!!!! If you like Hugh Jackman, he has a message for you on the next blog post. The one posted today.

Enjoy.
And thanks again for connecting and sharing.